FOUNDER’S STORY

Since the age of 10 I've been a competitive athlete, starting as a swimmer and progressing to triathlons and marathons.  I thrived on the excitement of competing and constantly improving my times. The dedication and discipline of waking up at 5am to train, the adrenaline rush of improving my times, and the immense feeling of accomplishment hitting the pool timing pad or crossing the finish line. 

No surprise that my Type A personality saw no boundaries and slowly crept into my school, work, and personal life.  As I pushed myself physically, I ignored my mental and emotional health.  I had to hit my target race times, I had to reach and exceed my sales quotas - anything less was a perceived failure.  I improved my racing times, I took on Ironman distance triathlons, I exceeded all sales quotas and made President’s Club - twice! From the outside, my life might’ve looked fantastic, but on the inside I was a total mess. I was struggling with disordered eating (highly restrictive dieting, frequent dieting, food guilt, and shame), amenorrhea, body anxiety, body dysmorphia, and an overall self-hatred of my appearance.

I reached a breaking point when the overwhelming fear of failure left me physically depleted, mentally stressed out, and emotionally raw. I also finally acknowledged that I did not know how to truly eat without guilt. I looked at food as the enemy, something that I only deserved if I had been “good”, like burning a ton of calories on a 50 mile bike ride or a 15 mile run. If I ate anything “bad” or exceeded my caloric limit for the day, I would punish myself by eating less (or nothing) the next day, feeling like a failure for not having enough willpower to resist food, and continuing to hate my body.  My fear of failure ultimately consumed me, leaving me physically drained, mentally overwhelmed, and emotionally vulnerable.  After decades of struggling, I had lost hope of ever establishing a healthy relationship with food.